Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice? Not on my watch!
First, these nitwits pushed people to take aspirin to protect the heart, and some of them ended up bleeding right through their gut. And the real unlucky ones bled out their brains.
And now, they’re back for an encore. And this time, they’re targeting the one body part that’s more important to a man than his ticker: the one located right below the belt.
In a new study, these so-called “experts” claim swallowing a daily aspirin after you’ve been diagnosed with prostate cancer will help cut your risk of dying from it by nearly 40 percent.
But gentlemen, whether or not you’ve been diagnosed with prostate cancer yourself, don’t reach for that bottle just yet.
Those sunny results had my BS meter going off the charts — so I did some digging of my own to get to the bottom of this for you.
Their study was pitifully small, tracking just 3,193 men with prostate cancer. At least they gave it a good long period of time — nearly three decades — but over all those years, all they could figure out was that taking aspirin AFTER you’ve been diagnosed — not before, and not when — “may” keep it from becoming lethal.
Of course, prostate cancer is already considered a “low risk” cancer — and one with a very good survival rate. Sometimes, no treatment at all is necessary.
The researchers must know their work isn’t up to snuff, because they claim they’re just getting started and that what we need now is a bigger study.
We already have one of those — published just last year. This one was three times bigger, and it found just the OPPOSITE: Men who start on aspirin therapy after a prostate cancer diagnosis are 46 percent MORE likely to die of the disease. Not only that, they’re 37 percent more likely to die of any other cause.
That last bit is critical, because whether you have prostate cancer or not, aspirin comes with serious and even deadly risks — including internal bleeding, brain hemorrhages and stroke.
So if the prostate cancer doesn’t kill you, all that aspirin certainly will.
When it comes down to it, there’s really just one good use for aspirin: When you bring home flowers for your lady, crush one up and put in the vase.
Aspirin’s bad for you…but it’s great for keeping flowers fresh.