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Don’t let party poopers spoil your health

The killjoys are out in force, trying to throw a cold, wet blanket over everything that makes your life worth living.

These nitwits are peddling the supposed benefits of giving something up for January as part of a bogus detox program. For “DRY-uary,” they want you to give up booze for 30 days; and for “VEGAN-uary,” they push you to make your month meatless and dairy-free.

But a “dry” and plant-based diet doesn’t make them any healthier — and switching to one won’t make you any healthier, either.

All the claims for giving up booze for any period of time are total BS. They claim tossing your liquor will help your liver, but that’s only true if you’re a total lush. If you’re a moderate drinker, your liver is doing just fine.

And you SHOULD keep pouring — a daily drink or two can actually protect your heart, prevent dementia, and help you live longer. Non-drinkers, however, show a higher risk of diabetes and more bad cholesterol than good cholesterol.

The Veganuary vigilantes also want you to “cut out cholesterol” — but that’s NOT a marker of good health. In fact, plunging cholesterol while on a diet of twigs and leaves is a sign that you need help — and fast. Cholesterol is critical to your immune system, helps your memory, and is responsible for carrying around fat-soluble nutrients.

These veg-heads promise the sun, moon, and stars if you join their juice-cleansing militia — lower blood pressure, reduced risk of diabetes and heart disease — but they fail to mention that you’ll lose muscle, become anemic, and perform like wilted lettuce in the sack. And the Journal of Agricultural and Food Chemistry has shown that these malnourished vegans are actually at GREATER risk for heart attack and stroke.

So if you have a loved one giving up booze and meat for January, do them a favor: Gather their loved ones and show up with a six-pack and a pound of bacon.

It’s time for an intervention.

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